Singing Phil Collin's songs and hoping no one hears me...
I fell asleep for four hours. FOUR HOURS. What kind of a nap is that? Its my mom's birthday (more on that later unless I forget. Or get lazy.) and I was going to clean and finish some artwork and scan somethings and update some things on the site, but alas...
On the good side, beyond the napping and my weird repetitive dreams featuring zombies and Dick Clark, my dad's coming down to visit. So we're all going to go out for dinner, where my dad will embarrass all with a powerful rendition of "The Brown Cow Prayer".
Personally, I think Jesus hangs his head in shame every time its begun. Its about.. thanking a brown cow for the milk it brings... ?? Its probably a metaphor for animal abuse or something. At my uncle's restaurant a couple of weeks ago, my dad, in our secluded corner, began singing at the top of his lungs. Other diners stopped, forks halfway to their mouths to listen.
Either it was shock, fascination, or my dad's a friggin Siren.
Online Palmistry (link via Opine Bovine) -- we actually did palmistry yesterday for Alicia's presentation. I now know my teacher has a healthy sex life. ...Could have gone through my life without that knowledge. Anyway, this is what I got online:
Intellectual matters are probably important to you, and you have a natural ability to express yourself well.
At times, you may tend to be overly sensitive to criticism. You can be excessively cautious or narrow in your outlook unless you receive the right kind of encouragement.
You have so many interests that you may have trouble deciding which ones to pursue.
You are a warm hearted person, with much love to give.
There may be times in your life when you give in to feelings of sadness or depression.
You are likely to make decisions based on intuition or feelings rather than intellect. You do have the capability to detach yourself emotionally and look at situations objectively, but you may not have developed this trait as well as you should.
There are inconsistencies in your energy level, possibly triggered by external factors or emotional changes. No matter what circumstances come your way, you have a generally positive attitude which may help you overcome life's obstacles.
Your optimistic outlook helps increase your problem-solving capabilities.
You have a basically strong constitution, and should enjoy good health most of the time.
You are likely to make many changes in the direction of your life. This may be based on interruptions due to health problems, or it may be that you just have trouble focusing your energy.
No matter what other factors influence your personality, there is an under lying sense of practicality that you can draw on if you wish.
-- Alicia's idea on this was that your born with genetics deciding the lines in your hand, so it didn't really seem plausible. However, everything above is pretty much me. (Although, there is the contradiction concerning health...ahem..)
Thursday, January 17, 200212:51 p.m.
listening to; Drive You Home / Garbage
reading; Obernewtyn by Isobelle Carmody
..::: - & - :::..
She's a maniac, Maniiiiiiiac....
After watching the multiple English presentations that... presented themselves today, I came to the conclusion that my particular presentation was rather pitiful. I didn't even win over the masses with food. Today, in one particular project we got POPCORN. Half the class was ready to pledge allegiance, and the other half revelled in freeloading. It was as if a small country were created, and welfare abuse abounded.
Although, I could probably have done without 'World Trade Center Jeopardy', everyone else's was entirely so much better than mine. To remind: My peripheral aid was a PUPPY. In BEANBAG form. And I'm just going to CONTINUE drilling my points home with CAPITILIZATION. I think I'm just going to add a mental note that the next presentation I do should include cookies. Or at the very least, peppermint candies stolen from Boston Pizza.
(EG, Alicia distracts the employee as I mumble, "We didn't get any candies with our bill... soo..uhm...", then grab the bowl and race out the door. Several days later I'm caught with Enrique Iglesias by the Boston Pizza Boss and his Posse, etc etc etc..)
I'm still in the process of looking into domains -- at the moment I'm so entirely broke that it might take me awhile. I'm thisclose to a cardboard box, a bag of crack and a tragic appearance on Sally. Plus, Alicia and I are planning a road trip to Winnipeg, and if I'm going to be able to make a fool out of myself in an unknown city, I'll need to save up the $$$$.
Oh, and on a somewhat unrelated note: I'm having a 24-hour party. More on that later...after I grab a bent spoon and some matches...
Thursday, January 17, 200212:24 p.m.
listening to; Drive You Home / Garbage
reading; Obernewtyn by Isobelle Carmody
..::: - & - :::..
Forgetting to update about the whirlwind that is surprisingly not my life:
-I lost my email account for 24 hours because of an overabundance of emails. Right. I'm sorry. But I don't care that my Budget can be saved with Credit. Nor do I really, truly need that "possible vacation to the islands." What is a possible vacation anyway? Like, "Well, you can either end up at the Islands, or drugged in a boot camp in Paraguay. Either way, SALSA!")
-I went to go see 'Lord of the Rings'.. did I mention that? Twice, in fact. Once with Brad and Lizzy. Once while Sarah and Jason made out beside me. The first experience was more enjoyable, and I've decided to NOT be a third wheel ever again. Thus, I've saved my Square status. Hah. (Promising, also, of course, to never make that joke again.) By the way, I know I sound ever the immature one, but was Legolas the Elf not good-looking? Even with his "look at my girlish long hair" thing? Yeah. I don't even know what happened at the end. As soon as Legolas came on, that was it for me. However, I do know that a lot of people in the audience looked MIGHTY pissed.
-I had a presentation today on Superstitions and Legends -- I talked rapidly, it was over after an excrutiating ten minutes, and I actually used a beanie baby puppy as a peripheral aid. The showing of the dog was accompanied with, "Look! A PUPPY!", followed with, "Or, as some in Normandy believe, A HOUND OF HELL!" It was bad. But, I leave you with these links that I found when researching for the several hours I'll never get back:
Face In the Mirror -- An essay on 'Bloody Mary'... when I was younger I heard about the stories and spent every night obsessing about them. I'm still afraid to walk past mirrors in the dark.
And since Brad is home and cranky and I have to get off the computer, these are some urban legends:
I love it when you can absolutely fall in love with pieces of art in the span of ten minutes, then re-examine your initial reaction and mesh it successfully with the detail therein-- when upon first glance something seems to be one way, but upon a second its completely different then you originally thought. I love it when artists explore with their work, when they create exquisite pieces of shocking fascination with brush strokes or shutter clicks -- I've been adoring my obsession with artists for several years now, romping in my previous ignorance towards Art, with a capital-- the monosyllabic all-encompassing word for beauty, ugliness and self-expression.
And I especially love it when I find an artist that embodies that exact mix of weirdness, exploration and expression: in short, shrines are built, emails sent and I order all I know to go see it. (Then become violently deflated when they ask me where the Victorian ladies are, and the green grass fields, and why the hell is that bunny cutting meat?!?.. Right.)
Wednesday, January 16, 200211:31 p.m.
listening to; Drive You Home / Garbage
reading; Obernewtyn by Isobelle Carmody
..::: - & - :::..
Teehee! My name's Fushia, and I'm a trophy wife!
Remind me, that despite the fact that every single Walmart greeter moves me to pity, (Eg, "Hi. Welcome to Walmart. SHOOT ME NOW.") its still important for me to enter the store, to ensure that my mom doesn't buy birthday gifts for my impressionable 6 year old cousi-n-iece. (New term I coined. Use it as you will. Use it more if you're from a trailer park.) (But to clear up: she's my cousin, but she calls me Aunty. Because it makes me feel a little like Aunt Sarah from Lady and the Tramp. But nicer.)
ANYWAY, she came back from her foray into the wonderful world of blue vests with a giant doll in a red dress that talks. At first, I was rather impressed. ("So, you just press this arrow and it TALKS?!?" ... then there was the inevitable freaking out as I worried about whose soul they'd captured in the 7-inch plastic figure, but after it was explained that I was "simple-minded" and "primitive", I conceded the point, married and devoted my life to making my husband happy. Right.)
But, upon further inspection, this is what I found:
Flower bubbles around the doll proclaim: "I can tell you what I'm wearing!" (eg, how many lonely, lonely internerds have brought this doll home?? Really.)
Also included, are OVER 20 PHRASES!! Yay! Lets see what phrases those are:
"This pink top is great for the mall"
"Thanks! This pink top looks great! I'm ready for some shopping. Lets hit the mall!"
"I feel like a star in this shiny, colourful dress!"
"Hey Girlfriend! This red dress really kicks! (TEEHEE) -- song discussing dancing, romance and red dresses..."
"Hey Girlfriend! I like this pink colour! TEEHEE"
"Wow, this pink top brightens up my face!"
"Please help me brush my hair! TEEHEE" (Because I'm a hooker with a cocaine addiction and have lost my motor skills...?)
"Hi, I'm Fushia!" (said with emphasis and a lot of retardation... "Plus, I can't really spell "Fuschia", but girls don't need an education, so lets hit the mall, girlfriend! Then when we both become jaded, married to millionaires and addicted to prescription drugs, we can wallow our sorrows in poolboys, liquor and plastic surgery. Yay for life!")
And look! Fushia even comes with a SHOPPING BAG! Hair accessories, a cell phone and a brush half the size of her head!
Okay. Well, I'm sure you see my point. But to be honest? Yeah.. as a small impressionable six-year old I would have WORSHIPPED this doll, even though it should be retitled: "If Jennifer Lopez were EyeCandy... no, wait.." -- its very reminiscent of that Simpson's episode where Lisa Simpson battles Talking Malibu Stacy, blah blah blah --
It actually reminds me of Melissa and I playing Barbie's when we were younger. (Y'know. 15, 16. Hah.) Because New Kids on the Block were popular at the time, we each had a doll. Although, I was slightly bitter because Mel got Joey McIntyre and I ended up with Danny (who as we all know, was the ugly one. With a rat tail the size of my arm.) When we played Barbies, Joey would always kidnap Barbie and take her to his Castle Hideaway-- I think Danny would be "at home sleeping", or channelling our 7 year old aggression by being melted over a hot stove.
Wednesday, January 16, 200210:35 p.m.
listening to; Drive You Home / Garbage
reading; Obernewtyn by Isobelle Carmody
..::: - & - :::..
Wisdom: Stealing lemons from the Conservatory whenever possible.
